September 14, 2010

allison.s nest...

everyone has a story.
a very interesting chapter in my storybook began over two years ago 
when i read kelly rae roberts book..."taking flight"
{i wrote about it here}
basically i had stuffed all my creative hoopla deep down inside me 
and it was starting to rebel.
it raised it.s claws and showed it.s teeth...hissing as it went.
oh, i heard it all right.  but i was afraid to confront it.  
afraid of what?  i don.t know.  
i.m a chicken i guess.  i was fearful.  doubtful.  
who am i to pick up a paintbrush again?
who am i to take extra time to myself to create?
who am i to think others may be interested in my art?
gratefully for me i have a friend.
you know one of those
 "every girl needs a friend exactly like you "
 kind of friends.
i confided in her and got questions like...
who are you not to pick up a paintbrush again?
who are you not to take extra time to yourself to create?
ummmm...{silence on my part.}
so knowing me as well as she does, she knew i would need 
an assignment to tame those wild creative beasts within my heart.

allison:     "well, my birthday is just around the corner 
and the only thing i want from you is a painting of a nest."
me:     "i don.t paint nests."
allison:     "well you better get started!"

i tell ya what...i painted A LOT of nests those next few months.
A LOT of nests.  none of them were good enough in my eyes for allison.
finally i thought i just might have it.    a nest.  
a nest with real turquoise cabachon eggs. one for each of allison.s little chicks.  
{she is a jewelry designer so i thought the turquoise was ever so clever}
then i sat this little egg filled nest upon my shelf and picked it apart.
brush stroke by brush stroke by brush stroke.
allison.s birthday came and went.  i probably gave her something lame.
14 months went by since i first started painting little brown nest.
and the longer she sat on that ledge, the more she grew on me.
i started to realize that just like life...nests aren.t perfect.
they are perfectly imperfect.  and if we hold our talents back until we think they are perfect, then we will never share them with others.
what part of journey did i misunderstand?  a wonderful man i adore once said...
"enjoy the journey"


i bet you can guess what allison got for her birthday this year!


cul*ti*vate the journey

34 comments:

  1. Dear chrissy I just love how you weave together your stories. This is so beautiful. I love, love, love your nest. I love that Allison challenged you to create your own nest. Who are you? You are beautiful, brave, wise, talented. You are a shining star in this universe who deserves to cultivate her own journey!

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  2. i see so many things here. i see an artist. i see an obedient artist, because when her wise friend asks her to paint a nest, she lovingly paints a nest. i also see an artist who might not realize that while she was thinking she couldn't paint a nest, she painted three (not just one or two, but three!!) absolutely gorgeous turquoise cabachon eggs to go inside the nest (that she didn't think she could paint). oh, yes, i see an artist....an absolutely fabulous artist who can paint beyond her wildest imagination.....and she can even paints nests (and beautifully, at that!!!). hugs to you, sweet nest artist!!! xoxo, :))

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  3. Friends are awesome! Love that sweet nest dear Chrissy!

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  4. This is amazing; The gift Allison gave you is a treasure! We all have a voice to share, some paint, some sing, some cook, some write, etc. We all have talent, it is our responsibility in life, to find it and share it. Then we are truly
    as you said, in your other post, BEAUTIFULL~xXx

    I love your painting; I love turquoise!

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  5. Brushstroke by brushstroke you weaved your story into Allison's nest. You left the nest when you were ready and both you and Allison received a beauti-FULL gift!

    So many of us are afraid (like you said, "Of what?) to even try. Your words gracefully shared how enjoying the journey is the best part.

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  6. *yay* go Chrissy, go Chrissy!!!!!


    Keep on painting girly, you know those skills of yours need to be put to work, do not hold back lady, you can do great things, I know you can ;)

    Hugs

    Micki x

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  7. Chrissy this is an amazing post! And I love your painting! Its beautiful! Last month I just started reading Kelly's book and love it! So many of us can relate to this. I had wanted to pick up a paintbrush for my whole life! And finally in February I did. I recently posted about fear as well.

    This post really spoke to me and I thank you for being so honest and putting it out there!

    :)

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  8. Chrissy, You are GIFTED! I LOVE this post and I'm going to print it out and hang it by my neglected creating space.

    I am SO thankful I found you in this blogging world. Your self-talk is a lot of the same self-talk I have, and I appreciate you sharing it so openly, encouraging us other shy artists to keep painting those nests, for ourselves, and then to one day let them see light!

    Thank you so much for this, Chrissy. Your nest is beautiful.

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  9. I love your painting! YOU ARE A TALENTED ARTIST. Your friend is lucky to receive her nest. I have said so many of the same things to myself as well. I may not have found my special artistic medium yet but I still keep at it in hopes that one day something will click. In the meantime, we creative types have to express ourselves in all kinds of ways. Without that flow of expression, we'd be like flowers expecting to grow without any water.

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  10. Chrissy, i just know that everyone reading this post can relate to it on some level - I know I certainly can! By sharing your heart, you open it to others and help us to connect to one another. It's a beautiful thing!! As is your nest - I really, really love that!!

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  11. Chrissy, i so like your story - and your painting! It is GORGEOUS!!! Art IS difficult sometimes, in my experience it can be heaven and hell, but it's so worth while to cling to it. Ah. i haven't painted in too long a while, and your post inspires me a lot!

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  12. I feel like I could have written this post. I do the same thing... create and then put it aside. Not thinking it's good enough. I loved your nest and I'm sure your sweet friend will too. Thanks for sharing your thoughts. It's nice knowing I'm not alone:)

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  13. Oh I am the luckiest friend that ever lived!!!!! My little nest greets me each morning as I start the day in my kitchen.. The best part of my little nest is that you my dearest friend Chrissy helped me build my nest. Not just this painting, but the one that surrounds and protects my little family. There are pieces of you Chrissy that I have taken from your lead that I used to feather my own nest. You are an artist whether you have a paintbrush, Kitchen Aide mixer, Pen, or keyboard. You are artistic in friendship and motherhood and love. Much love and thanks for my nest!

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  14. way to go ..you worked through it and the results are wonderful..you inspired me today with this!!

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  15. you have such talent Chrissy! I am always in awe of everything you do and you do it so well. I love it. Thanks for giving me permission to do something for me today that will bring me joy.

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  16. chrissy, i love this little nest! i sure would love to see more of your painting. i know those demons you speak of...those "who do you think you are?" demons. they've been on my lately as i've been trying to create my portion of connie's 21 secrets class. i see all the great work the other contributing artists have done and i'm so...not...there... at least not in the mixed media area. i need to take some of my jewelry and photography mojo and transfer it over! love you!

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  17. sweet, sweet, and yes, clever nest! i'm so glad you are finally giving it to her. she will love it. i LOVE seeing your painting! thanks so much for being brave and sharing it with us. muah!

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  18. bet allison loved her gift! love your posts and your artwork. i too started creating after i read kelly rae's book. got the juices flowing.
    hugs,
    tara

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  19. hatching
    this nest
    was worth
    the wait,
    with such
    turquoise treasures
    & messy nesty
    entwining twigs.
    of course
    it looks
    RICH,
    because it reflects
    the housing holding
    that you too
    offer to others.
    (so thankful,
    i am.)
    xoxox
    (sometime
    i'll have to
    share w/you
    the recent
    eggs at our house!).

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  20. Chrissy! I ADORE that nest! It is so beautiful and sweet and brave and so are you.

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  21. I AM ALL CHOKED UP OVER HERE!!! thank GOD for a friendship like this!!! So very happy for you. Can you tell I am just beside myself from your journey and THE ENCOURAGEMENT it brings to me, TO ALL OF US??

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  22. i think your nest is lovely and the turquoise was indeed delightfully clever!! glad to read that you are working with those 'creative beasts' within you ;)

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  23. So great Chrissy. I totally know what you mean. I carry this quote from Marianne Williamson around in my wallet and just today came across it.

    “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

    You have to share. I am the same.. is it perfect? no, try again? ugghh... it is hard but I am so glad you shared this story with us and your gorgeous (and clever) painting. You have a lucky friend indeed!
    xo,
    dana

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  24. I love every single detail...your nest is gorgeous! You are beautiful(inside and out), therefore your art is beautiful...keep painting...keep sharing.

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  25. I really appreciated this post. I often get wound up in the perfectionist knot. Thanks!

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  26. THAT is really fantastic. I love the way you off-set the nest - the vibrant lime green and then the turquoise eggs- such great, great composition and color and the nest looks so real- don't hold back your beautiful art from us- it is a treasure to the eye and a pleasure for the soul.

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  27. how did i miss this???
    this beautiful post.
    this beautiful gift made for your beautiful friend.

    you know i know the artist fabulousness lurking inside of you!!!
    you need to set it free....let it fly!!!

    your nest is perfect!!

    i love you
    xoxo
    k

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  28. Sweet Nest Maker, oh how I love this nest you built! I remember seeing other nest-related-creations by you and Lovin them lots! Your friend is a lucky bird :) I have these 2 nests fallen by my door that got me thinking about things. I just love your thoughts, always.

    Into the weekend I go w these feathered thoughts.

    <3
    Carissa

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  29. And ps. I AM SO GLAD U ARE "out of the closet." I can so relate :)

    you + your art = beauty to be shared

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  30. I adore your nest! And your story. It sounds like Allison is indeed a wonderfully special friend - just like you are.

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  31. You know what's funny? I have a similar story! I painted a picture for my friend's 30th birthday...but I didn't quite get finished in time, so I gave her a "gift certificate" and said that I would present it to her when it was finished. Well... days, months...yes, even YEARS (3, in fact) went by, and finally she demanded to see the picture. Of course she loved it exactly as it was and insisted that she take it. So I obliged. I hadn't added anything to that painting in the 3 years that I had it. In fact, it was complete before her 30th bday. But it wasn't complete in my eyes. because I felt that I had more to add, that I could be more creative, that it wasn't quite perfect. I admire those artists that aren't afraid to produce "imperfect" works...and to share them with the world. because how else do we get any better than by practicing, practicing, practicing. One day I will be that kind of person. But for now I'm just a little more careful of the creative committments I make. :)

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  32. chrissy when i put the little gift together that i gave you a few days ago it had a handmade card attached. on the card was a girl i had painted and scanned and printed. before i got out of the car i tore it off. feeling like it was not quite good enough for you. you and i both know where this fear comes from. one who wants us to think we are not good enough- not talented enough- not pretty enough. but we ARE.
    you have beautiful talent in you chrissy. don't be afraid to share it.

    i am going to send the card to you :-)

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  33. What a special friendship you all have. I LOVE the nest. Such beautiful paint strokes and colors!!

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  34. So funny..."birds of a feather" :) Kelly Rae's book was the catalyst for me as well. Oh, how I love that girl for sharing her journey with the rest of us who needed to hear it. I've visited here before---how fun to know it's you, dear future Brave Girl friend. Can you believe it's almost here? So excited to meet you in person.
    My best---Lara

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your comments put the biggest smile on my face!
thank you so very much!